IMAGINED RELATIONSHIPS

Relationships start from that magical spark. Most people call it love at first sight; others, being struck by Cupid’s arrow. Once we become captives of this spark, the imagination begins to play. For the first time in years, you see your future in clear view. You see times spent in parks and beaches, holding hands and building sand castles. You picture trips to some far-off destination, exploring the sights and exploring each other. Sooner or later, you develop a mind photo of a family together, with perhaps two children in a house on a hill. It is the pursuit of this imagination that leads lovers to go on a pursuit of true love. It is the pursuit of this imagination that encourages two people seated on a bench to sit beside each other, to share an embrace, a kiss, and eventually, goodbyes.

I've never imagined it to end this way. In fact, I never saw it coming until a thorough afterthought of the signs for months later. I would like to think it is my fault that the imagined relationship we had eventually faded to oblivion. But it takes two to tango and thus, I am more convinced it was more of our individual differences, flaws, misgivings, and unfounded assumptions that brought us to a demise. These cracks in the imagination are what led her (and sooner or later, me) to pursue a different imagination of a relationship. Perhaps, one with less bickering and more communication. With someone who pays a listening ear regardless of our own myopic ideas and selfish talk.

So here I am, imagining once more what the future has for me. Chronicling a love foretold. I don’t wish for the next one be a real-life fairy tale or something out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. I just want it to be real—the love, care, understanding, even the few moments of anguish that comes in every romance. Again, there will be poetry, perhaps short stories, even books written for this prophesied woman. There will be walks with her, barefoot, on foreign coasts and romantic dates in never-before-heard-of restaurants. We will make love like we've never made love before. We will fight like children over a game of Scrabble, or missing out on monthsarries. But we’ll always love each other no matter what caveat God puts along our way.

For it is in these worst case scenarios that we prove if someone is really worth staying with. I’d want her to be strong and committed if ever I’ve become Will Smith in “Pursuit of Happyness”, sharing the pursuit with me instead of doing what Thandie Newton did in the film. I want to be loved like Hugh Jackman in “Real Steel”, who despite his many wrong turns and disappointments, Evangeline Lilly never gave up hope on him. I’d stick around for her in sickness and in health, just like Jake Gyllenhaal in “Love and Other Drugs”. She’d do the same for me like Jennifer Connelly in “A Beautiful Mind”. We will search for each other like John Cusack and Kate Beckinsale in “Serendipity”, or be best friends-turned-lovers like Billy Crystal and Meg Ryan in “When Harry Met Sally”. We will grow old together like Noah and Allie in “The Notebook”.

But for imagined relationships to become real life, both lovers must be courageous, strong, and determined to overcome the odds, even those made by themselves. Stuff like pride, selfishness, and envy. For while we think love is supposed to make us strong, it does not. It’s a sickness, meant to make us weak. But if we are already strong even before the imagination comes to life, before the weakness sets in, we can weather hail or storm hand-in-hand and by being the strength to each other.

To you, my imagined relationship, the woman meant for me. I love you.